So, I will start by saying that I found a bimbo in the supermarket and I do believe that it is a good way to start Christmas eve... but more on that later.
My last night in Lima, I wasn't expecting so much but a girl in my room that was about to go back to Italy the next day to see her family and husband wanted to go out for one last Pisco sour. We searched for a couple places that was recommended to be the best. One place we couldn't find and the other was closed... when we realized this we were standing in front of a turkish restaurant, the same restaurant in fact that I had gone out with Quentin on my first day to have a Pisco sour and talk about spirituality.
Why not, eh? we ventured in and ended up having the same seats... she chose them. Lots of more spiritual conversations on where are paths were and what we had learned. She was the second person to look strangely at me that I didn't have a master or a guru. I explained that I had many teachers from all corners of the world that taught me different things. One thing that we shared, that has been shared with me from not one of my teachers but from many is that this is the time to take responsibility for how our lives are and what we do and where we go and who we are. Everything. It was an easy conversation and the Pisco Sour was delicious.
Tarot came up in conversation "You read tarot?" her eyes widened, I answered that I did and she clapped her hands excitingly. I gave her a reading back at the hostel... I guess I gave her some clarity in her life because she gave me a bracket with these beans or seeds on them, red and black for protection of evil spirits, Much thanks and a good energy exchange. Time to get a couple hours of sleep before my early flight to Iquitos the next day. I woke up a couple minutes before I was suppose to. Paid my Hostel and left.
I flew into Iquitos on Wednesday to see what kind of an experience ayahuasca is. For those of you who do not know what ayahuasca is I will give a brief explanation.
Basically Ayahuasca is a black liquid from a vine that is found in the Amazon rainforest. Shamans have been using this liquid to put themselves in a different state of mind, battle their inner demons, reach high connections with God or the earth, some even explain experiences of seeing their whole life from birth or seeing how the world was created. Most people or books refer to the process as rather... unpleasant, I will go into more depth later.
Picked up from the airport and driven right to the centre, not sure where it is, Percy who is the "shaman" with apparently 15 years of experience... which is interesting because he doesn't look more than 30 said in his broken english that its about 35-40 minute drive. The lush green of trees and shrubs are tightly packed together and everywhere. We arrive after about 35 minutes and he gets one of his helpers to grab my big bag and we hike into the forest. I didn't realize that it was going to be that long of a hike, but turned out to be a good half hour. The hike was wet and a bit slippery, the ground was made up of mud and hardened clay on the beaten path. Overcast skies shielded the sun, but the hot humidity that seemed to always stick to the skin. Smell of wilderness and wet musky wood was in the air. Bugs, mosquitos, crickets all around. We finally arrived to the centre, tall huts on stilts were everywhere, and stumps of thick trees lead the way to each of them.
I payed the money for the week I would be staying there. Talked to a couple others that were there as well, very kind, smiling, hippie type people. That oddly enough didn't have a lot to say about the ceremony that they are already taken. I had signed up for 3 over the course of a week.
I was led to my room, which was my own hut with a hammock, how cool is that, right? No electricity, no running water, an outhouse style toilet was connected to the hut for more convenience. A black stray cat had taken a liking to me and always came around. After waiting for a while in my hut I heard a knock on the door and was given some lunch. All the meals were mostly vegetarian, sometimes with a boiled egg, usually served with a vegetable soup. after more waiting I had a wonder around the place, very calm, peaceful and very alive, got to see a sloth moving in the trees, heard many birds, lots of insects everywhere. Later on in the day it was time for the flower bath. We were to meet at the small river that flowed through the centre and under the massive hut that was for the ceremony itself. we washed in the river. Percy blessed the water with flowers from the amazon in it by blowing smoke from a ceremonial cigar and poured it over our heads.
Now, I had thought! this is where the fun begins, We were asked to wait in the ceremony hut with our blankets and a flashlight. We waited and waited, finally percy arrived in ceremony dress, which was pretty much that, a patterned thin robe and a hat. A single candle in the middle of this octagon sat lighting the place. about 30 feet in diameter and 30 feet at the tallest point in the centre.
Coming to each of us we were to cup our hands and a perfume was poured, to rub on our skin. after that each one of us went up to Percy to take part, a mixture of ayahuasca was made... which stuck in my head because I always remember ayahuasca being of one plant... anyways to that later. the goblet of ayahuasca was blessed with smoke again and given, each one of us drank from the goblet and went back to our blanket and thin mattress and our personal bucket (yes, bucket). The candle was blown out by the translator and Percys' helper.
Darkness filled the room as Percy began to sing and whistle. Dark is one thing, in the amazon it is true darkness. No moon, no stars, no light! I couldn't see my hand in front of my face. Blackness. I waited, building up with anticipation. This was it, this is what I came out to the jungle, Hoping that a vision with some clarity would come to me. I waited.
I was also very tired having not slept much the night before. I drifted in and our of sleep, my dreams of travellers smiling at me and reaching out their hands. I open my eyes again, not much has changed in the hour i had been sitting there, didn't feel much different, it should have kicked in by now. A while later, I was asked if I wanted more... Why not?
I took another goblet, this time much fuller... and waited.
I could hear people throwing up in their buckets, I felt queasy and my stomach was clenching itself. I still didn't see anything. My body started to feel funny, same feeling you get when you get a buzz from drinking. A light would flash every once in a while, while people headed for the toilet I couldn't comprehend why at the time. Finally I knew... yep have to get to the toilet now! standing up everything hit me. much like drinking while sitting and then standing and forgetting you just went through a case of beer. once I hit the toilet everything came out of me... Both ends... fast! If you have ever had food poisoning you will know what I mean. Except I learned later that that is what is suppose to happen? Not from what I read or heard... but from this place...
I lay back down on my mattress, completely sober at this point... My mind began to wander and think... Why did I just pay a man that I don't know 500 dollars to make me sick? I began to think of all that I wanted to accomplish there... Middle of the amazon, Shamans, Ayahuasca... This was suppose to be a new beginning. A fresh start and clarity of what exactly was my true purpose. Did i really just leave all my loved ones in Canada to be sick in the dark with strangers trying to grasp some sort of "enlightened" experience? I felt sad for the things I left behind. Sleep. I just needed sleep... I slept and waited for the ceremony to come to an end.
At the end, Percy came to each of us and did a final blessing and we were allowed to go to bed in our hut. I got back, groggy for I just slept for 2 hours. pulled my mosquito net around the bed and tried to sleep, Oddly enough I couldn't for how tired I was.
My mind was unsettled, I realized that I wasn't just coming for an experience. I was coming for answers... I remembered Nepal suddenly and shook my head at what a fool I was! Nepal did bring me to new heights spiritually... but in unexpected ways. I went to Nepal with dreams of meditating on a mountain top with a great sage or guru! What happened... I meditated with a man that owned a bookshop in the middle of a very busy tourist street in Pokhara. I made an strong effort with very little direction in Nepal and that is why I got what I needed from that experience. I didn't rely on anyone else, I did my own thing and tried! why was this any different.
2 More ceremonies and 6 more days... nothing to occupy myself with but meditation, writing and reading... doesn't sound half bad... Christmas! I realized again through doing ayahuasca and not receiving what I needed from it I remembered life is about enjoyment, pushing forward and most importantly balance... Balance was definitely missing from this. I need to go back to Iquitos and celebrate Christmas and enjoy myself.
And so I waited... the next day I slept long, breakfast came, more vegetables and soup. Percy and the translator were no longer there... the other helpers didn't speak english. I talked to a couple people that were there. A woman from Canada, originally from Poland told me that Percy would be back the following day. She said that I should give the healing plant another chance, it had helped her a lot. She blonde hair and blue eyes... tired eyes, exhausted eyes. I told her that it wasn't more me. although she was open she was meek. She said that it has very good medicine, she said it in a way that made me smirk... She had no idea what was in it, not a clue.(seemed lost to me... but hey, so am I) It reminded me of what Michelle had said about a friend that told her that a bracelet had "energy" in it... but had no idea what kind of energy when questioned.
Finally the next day after reading quite a bit, writing my thoughts and thinking... Percy showed up with the translator, crossing his arms he wouldn't look in my eyes. Explained that there is a policy here and he won't refund any of my money even partially. The translator was looking at me sympathetically. I realized Percy does have a business and he has to make money but ever so misleading about ayahuasca until he had to explain... of course after money had been exchanged. So, you are apparently suppose to nearly shit yourself and making your body feel like someone beat you with a bat in your mid section... its not just ayahuasca it has other cleansing effects... right! thanks buddy! you tool!
Yeah, needless to say I wasn't too impressed with my experience. It did... by not doing anything bring me to some conclusions, in that aspect I guess I did gain something from it. Back to mediation and Balance. The hike back was ... muddy, slippery and I was slick with mud from my knees down, got to love the wet season, it had just rained before I left.
So, I said screw it! I had dedicated that money to the ceremony and I did learn something about getting back to myself, follow my own path with balance. Try not to let this bother me.
I waited at the main road, he said he wouldn't be long. Well, I waited some more... When he arrived, I could feel the hot energy coming off him. He wasn't all full of shit, but I definitely wouldn't call him a shaman, I truly believe there aren't that many left in the world. I wasn't too surprised by the fact, but I had hoped it would be a better ceremony.
So, no visions other than the dream I had before Ayahuasca had kicked in. No seeing my life from birth or past lives. No seeing the universe made. I didn't get any more clarity on what to write about or what to do about this life of mine... But I did get a sense that I should keep pushing forward and take time out to meditate.
Below I will leave a picture of that Bimbo I was telling you about.
mmm tall and bubbly... Hey! I never said I wasn't a geek!
Next post will be about Iquitos, christmas and armed robbery keep reading ... :)
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